Today is National Senior Citizens Day. I happen to have officially become a member of that group, at least according to the Kansas Star Casino in Mulvane, Kansas. Once I hit 50, I was able to get the senior discount at their Young at Heart Buffett they had on Wednesday's, it is closed at the moment however. The day I turned 50, I went in and got my discount! Getting old needs to have a few perks besides just still waking up.
As we get older we all start to feel that slow down happening, things ache that didn't when we were younger and things begin to change. Hair get greyer, eyes get weaker, and I that I have found myself doing the thing where you look in the mirror and put a few fingers on your hairline and push back a little and realise just how much for face is actually changing even if it isn't always really noticeable. I know many of you have done it too!
But there are many great things about getting older too! The first is, we are still here. We often have hit an age where we really stopped caring about how the world sees us and we just become at peace with who we are. Though I am sure my mom would tell you, I have always been at peace with who I am but it feels like it is even more so now, if that is even possible. Most of all, I hope everyone have learned to laugh at themselves a bit more and not take life so seriously. None of us are getting out of it alive so let's enjoy the ride!
Just keep in mind that, if you are lucky, you have to grow older, but growing up is always optional! I am convinced that is why people always think I am so much younger than I actually am, I refuse to be mature! I revel in my immaturity. Now, do not confuse that with being irresponsible. You can be very responsible and quite immature at the same time. I prove this daily.
The best thing you can do for yourselves is to find a reason to laugh everyday. P.R. always says that is job number one, to make me laugh. I have to admit, P.R. does a bang up job of that! Now, hopefully I can return the favor and give you all a good laugh or two today.
Here are the jokes!
Sadly, my mother passed away recently and it fell to me to take care of her estate.
I called to have her phone service cancelled but was told that since the phone was actually in my father's name, he would have to be the one to cancel it.
I informed the customer service person that my father had actually been dead for 12 years and would not be able to do so.
The customer service person regretfully told me there was nothing she could do to help me.
Then I had an idea.
I asked, "If I stop paying her phone bill you will just automatically disconnect the service, right?"
There was a long pause before she replied, "Yes sir, that is one option, but you should understand that doing so will damage your father's credit score."
I told my husband that menopause was hitting me hard, my hair was thinning fast.
Me: Pretty soon you won't have to pay for my trips to the salon anymore. Whenever I vacuum, all I seem to pick up is my own hair."
Husband: "On the bright side, if that's true, pretty soon you won't have to vacuum anymore either."
A few great quotes . . .
I don’t plan to grow old gracefully. I plan to have face-lifts until my ears meet.
We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. Will Rogers
The only reason I would take up jogging is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them while driving.
An archaeologist is the best husband a woman can have. The older she gets the more interested he is in her.
Old age is when you resent the swimsuit issue of Sports Illustrated because there are fewer articles to read.
I’ve learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.
When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of algebra.
I’m at an age when my back goes out more than I do.
I'm at the age that the only pole dancing I can to is grabbing the safety bar in the tub when I slip.
An 85 year old woman got stopped for speeding. When the young officer asked why she was driving so fast she replied, "I need to get there before I forget where was going!"
You know you are getting older when you get up feeling hung over and you didn't do anything the night before.
You know you are getting older when you bend over to pick up something and look around to see if you need to do anything else before you try to stand back up.
You know you are getting older when you are happy to pay for valet parking just so you don't have to find your car later.
And last but not least . . .
You know you are getting older when you have to get up from taking a nap so you can get ready to go to bed.
Stay young, even if it is just at heart!